Monday, July 21, 2008

Vince Lombardi and Love

For years, I’ve taken issue with the famous Vince Lombardi quote: “Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing.”

“What a terrible thing to say!” I’ve argued.

What about the game itself? Is there no value in the mere idea of playing? Is Lombardi’s message that we should only feel happy when we come out on top on the end?

Well, Packer fans, I think I’ve had an epiphany based on a situation I heard about recently.

Carlie was dating a guy with cute, single friends. So she hooked her friend Jen up with one of them. Fortunately, Jen and the guy’s friend hit it off. Unfortunately, Carlie’s guy ended up being a dud. So now she has to hear all about the great budding relationship she instigated, even though her own relationship is tanking. It makes her really mad.

It’s a scenario we all take a gamble on when we bring friends together. There’s always a chance they’ll score the most, even though you invited them to the field.

Carlie has been ignoring Jen ever since she started calling to gush about the new relationship. She isn’t proud of her behavior, but she just can’t bring herself to listen to the romantic babble she wanted for herself.

So I think I finally see what Vince – I can call him that, right? – may have been saying. Maybe sometimes, it isn’t enough to just be in the game. You invite people to play, but ultimately you want to win.

When it comes to relationships, winning isn’t everything. It’s the only thing.


John said...

There's no reason why everyone can't "win." Dating isn't a competition. I know it isn't one for me. You make an effort, be yourself, and things fall where they fall. It's not an either or deal. Be happy for the friend's success, and if the successful friend is insensitive or annoying about it, you say in about 5 seconds time, "How about a little sensitivity here. I'm happy for ya but you're excessive..." And that's it. This is a time where men and women sometimes differ but not always. A guy would often be direct, short, to the point.

Mostly this sounds like petty jealousy and the one who lost out needs to learn to be genuinely happy for others regardless of their own failures.

shoegirl said...

Unfortunately when it comes to dating women are very competitive. “Carlie” on one hand does need her space to mourn her loss as long as she doesn’t become too distant with her friend. On the other hand “Jen” needs to have a little sensitivity for her friend and stop constantly talking about her relationship. If Jen is the type of girl who needs a hint maybe it would also be in “Carlie’s” best interest to politely let “Jen” know that she can’t really hear about her new relationship right now because she is going through a break-up. FYI I think “Carlie’s” situation totally sucks if things work out for her friend "Jen", "Carlie" will be seeing the X since they now have friends in common.